It’s good to have nice friends. Friends, friends, friends are the only thing to have really. I should have learned this years and years back, that it’s good to have the company of others, when these times are so lonely. Four days ago journal (it’s been that long, yes, I was detained briefly, but never fear that now journal) we went out walking the city, the Good Doctor and I. First, we stopped by his house, I always go by there anyway, we mixed substances, off off we went.
Lately, my mind is encountering glorious God-soaked ideas. As we walked the other day, it was so nice to share my thoughts with him, what I had seen. About the evils of the strong, and the plights of the innocent and about the sacredness of the city buildings, my head was so expanded and the Good Doctor stared and listened. Sometimes he would just laugh and laugh, but he’s a good friend, maybe the chemicals made him laugh. Anyway, we went on and on, in this summertime/Christmastime city, in the white-stringed lighted Bethlehem, me and him, telling him of my calling and of all that I had to do. He kept saying, Wow man, heavy shit, wow and I was so happy to see him moved at my passions!! I feel so empty and alone lately and today I felt filled and vibrant, saying yes to our moment. In fact, this vibrance filled me so much, that as we walked on and on the medicines began to take a hold of me and raise me up to new heights. I felt my body pulsate and move and the Good Doctor watched me. I KNEW IT WAS HAPPENING. It was my transfiguration, I knew it, my true essence was being revealed to the world. I was doing it, I was becoming actualized, a new shepherd to lead the lost ones. My body began to shoot out rays of light, filling the night, I was a ball of pure fire, pure like the angels, only higher than them, and suddenly I turned around to watch the world vanish into some barren and grandiose Armageddon, beautiful sounds rushing through my body. A children’s choir appeared out of nowhere. They were singing. There were beautiful boys and girls, my children, they were praising, they were lifting up the wonderful words, “Oh come all ye faithful.....come to Bethlehem.…,” and I knew it!! That here, in this moment, I was being born, being transformed, that here really was Bethlehem (I was so overjoyed, I had been waiting for this moment for forever!!) and I was the baby Jesus born not in a manger but out of the great womb of the city, and I stood there letting the choir’s voice take me, cover me, and I realized that much more was at stake in the end, much more was at hand than my sacrifices, and then from these innocents I noticed a new song emerging, and the angels and heavenly hosts came and began to enter into eternal harmony, and a hidden angel, stammering and poor, stepped forward, the angel Gabriel, the very angel who appeared to incite the blessed, holy, and sanctified virgin Mary, and he began to speak words to me that no one should hear, not even you journal, or else face certain death. The company of angels then began to flap their wings with merriment at the words spoken to me, and suddenly this was no longer an angelic troupe before me, but a full orchestra in evening dress, and a little captain dancing about with birds flying up and out from a little hat he extended to me, and the birds became little bursts of fireworks, which became giant bursts of the ocean in her majesty and began to pulse in and out like a raging storm in heaven, and I was walking then along some kaleidoscope Hollywood Boulevard with all the sidewalk stars bursting forth from under my toes in radiant light above, to the high high heavens, the Good Doctor screaming at me in silence so strangely, and the skyscrapers above my heads were swinging like trees, I was electric and expanding in a concrete grove, taking on my new body and my enlightening, and the skyscrapers spun off into nothingness, in actuality I saw them, there were multitude upon multitude of unexplored, unseen galaxies, waiting for me. Then my own silence came.
The policemen woke me up in the middle of the street after years and years. A very large crowd had gathered. They were whispering to each other. They had seen it!! I knew that now they too understood the great mystery! I could not stop from smiling from laughing from shouting out, breaking free of the officer’s grasps, rushing to the crowd proclaiming, “Now now that the time is now, open your eyes, see the beautiful things God brings to us I am here to be the very second coming prophesied years....”
The crowd parted like a Red Sea, grabbing their children and shirking away, and I fell into the divide as the officers struck me across the head. The Pharisees will never understand. But I do not fear, my time has come.///